thoughts on being a boy mom | olive june
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thoughts on being a boy mom

when we found out at our very special gender reveal party that we were having a baby boy, i was shocked and yet so excited at the same time. although i had gone back and forth for weeks {the whole month of may i thought boy} i truly thought baby monaco was a girl {the chinese calendar/old wives tales were wrong- weird:)}. in addition to the surprise, i was a little nervous. although i have always wanted a baby boy {maybe this is due to the fact that my baby brother- now 23- was my live baby doll when i was eight} however, i had never actually pictured the bond like i had with a daughter. i love being a woman and embrace the idea of femininity so i had naturally pictured flower crowns, bows, tutus, dolls, ballet, painting our nails, and tea parties together. people had been telling me for years, "you just have to have a girl!" and i would think... why? i adore baby boys, too. i used to work at a school/daycare in columbus, ohio before moving to charlotte, north carolina and the little boys stole my heart. but most people thought the baby was a girl {mr. monaco kept saying- it's because they think of you} and i kept saying, i would love to have a boy ... but kept hearing, 'but you need a girl.' so i felt like if it wasn't a girl... other people would be disappointed. {insert extreme people pleaser} mr. monaco and i plan to take it all one child at time, but would love to have two-four kids .... so the tea parties aren't completely out yet. but if we end up with a 'house of boys' i will be just as thrilled! either way, there will be so much love. we will be blessed with the extreme honor of welcoming babies into the world... and will ultimately pray for their health.  
when i look back, the slight fear that went through my head {the day after finding out} was very superficial. it honestly wasn't disappointment at all {if it is coming across that way} but was just a little shock. however, the more i thought about it, the more excited i became to have a little boy in the house! boys around to protect me {mr. monaco is such a gentleman and will be such a great role model}. i also thought about Mary, the mother of Jesus, and wondered what she thought about when the angel appeared and told her she'd be having a precious son. did she wonder about mothering a baby boy? did she question the bond? i hope to use her as a role model of how to parent ... to mother with such gentleness and grace. i know i will not be a perfect parent. i just hope to always do my very best and stay open-minded. i know that i will screw up and i will fail- probably often. my hope is that i gain strength from our Heavenly Father, the perfect parent, and that i remain calm and kind in the process {knowing things won't be perfect.} 
by the second day of finding out ... the thought would bring me to tears. all happy and joyous tears. i was just so excited inside. praying had brought me so much peace and i was simply ecstatic. i know there is a special reason that God is giving us a boy and i can't wait to experience life with him. so many moms sent me sweet messages and texts telling me how special it is for your firstborn to be a boy. i think a baby {every baby and both genders} are so special, but in my heart, i knew i had always really wanted a boy first. it was so encouraging to hear from these moms and how they feel about their sons/the special bonds they have. i kept hearing about how boys always need their mama and how much they just love her! they also talked about the protectiveness they have for their mom and the endless fun they have together!  thank you so much to all who reached out. we definitely have the most supportive and loving 'village' to raise this baby in- he's already a very lucky little boy. i love how our future kids will have a big brother; something i always wanted as a little girl. i was raised around lots of older male cousins on my dad's side of the family... which i enjoyed so much. {and made up for my lack of a big brother in many ways} so bring on the dirt, goofiness, constant energy, planes, cuddling, buckeye football watching, trains, snails, superheroes, and ... helmets! 
now, i am over the moon excited to welcome a son into our life this winter! a son!!! ah! i plan to teach him how to scrub a toilet, how to have good conversations, how to dance without stepping on toes. i want to jump in mud puddles with him, take him to ice cream instead of eating a healthy dinner/eat cake for breakfast every now and then, play ball on the beach, explore baseball diamonds {mr. monaco's favorite} & football stadiums {my favorite}, to value eduction, and sometimes live on the edge! i want our home to be a place where he grows up and values women for more than a skinny waist and perfect hair. we will read books, bake cookies, and will always seek to make a difference in our community. something my parents always taught me. then suddenly, in the blink of an eye, we will send a fledging man out into the world to make his own way. to pursue his dreams and find out why God made him. my hope is that we trust him completely and that we let him fly confidently. by allowing him to fly, i hope he soars. and most importantly, i hope he is happy and feels God's love in his heart- always. 
for i will always thank God that He let me be the first girl to love a little boy that became an incredible man. 
our house may never be clean again {of course i will try my best- it's important to me- goodbye my love for white?!} but my heart is so full of love. i can't wait to meet you, my darling little boy! 
with love,
your mom- xo

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36 comments:

  1. When Jude was born, I was shocked he came out a boy! But he is the best. And now that he's here, my goal is to raise him in a way that makes his future in laws proud to have him marry their daughter.

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    1. awe, and he's so precious! i love this, amy! you are so sweet and are such a great mom! thank you. xo

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  2. Beautiful post! I am a girly girl and always thought I had to have a girl. Growing up I preferred babysitting boys. They were more affectionate than the girls and more interested in actual playing. And having my own son is amazing. A true mamas boy. Just like you, I hope to raise a good man and experience a lot of fun things with him along the way!

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    1. thank you so much, meghan! your comment means so much to me! xo

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  3. I am a boy mom too, and it is amazing. He's almost two now, and is so sweet and loving. There are definitely no tea parties happening, but he wants to wrestle all the time, which is kind of the same :). You have an amazing future ahead of you!

    Sarah Noel | www.sarahsmirks.com

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    1. awe… so sweet! thank you, sarah! we are blessed and are so excited!!

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  4. Congrats on your baby boy :) And I absolutely love your blogs font!

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    1. thank you so much! the font is called unkempt

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  5. You will be a fabulous boy mom, and he is so lucky to have you! Oh the fun you two will have! xo

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    1. you are so sweet! beyond excited- your little babe is very lucky as well! xo

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  6. Congratulations! I have a daughter and son, my son being the first born. I've loved being a boy-mom since day one, you will too!

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    1. awe, thank you! i feel so fortunate and am just so excited!

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  7. You will be an awesome boy mom. Boys are so much fun and filled with adventure. :)

    Stephanie @ thedishbcs.com

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  8. This is the sweetest post ever! I love being a boy mom. I am the oldest of 3 and also the only girl so I spent much of my childhood playing in mud and sitting on bleachers at little league games cheering my brothers on. I feel like that prepared me to be a boy mom. Since I ended up being a single mom to him for the first 9 years I am so glad God gave me a boy first. He and I have a bond that's pretty strong. Sure, I had to get used to the idea that nothing would ever be clean again. My car is and always has been filled with dirt from the baseball field and playgrounds and Pokemon cards and all things boy but I feel like having a boy balanced me and my girliness out. Now that i'm engaged, it's nice to be the only girl among the boys, at least for now ;)

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    1. awe, thank you! <3 means so much to me! your comment was so sweet- i really appreciate it! God is so amazing. love your bond! xo

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  9. Yes, bring on the constant energy, dirt, goofiness, snails... Boys are so much fun! My littleman just turned 4 and it's been such a fun journey already.Congrats on your littleman :-)

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  10. I really loved reading your post on being a boy mom. I have a 16 mo boy and another boy on the way. With my first I wanted a girl so bad that I had a breakdown when I found out it was a boy. But my boy is so loving and adoring, I can't imagine having a girl. I was hoping for a second boy and I got my wish. You'll be the Queen of the Castle mama!! P.s. Love your photography!

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    1. awe, thank you!! you are so sweet and i love your story! so special. we can't wait to meet our son!

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  11. This is so sweet! I have two older brothers, and I think I would like to have a boy first. I'm sure if I get pregnant the first time and it's a girl I won't be disappointed, but the idea of a boy first is in the back of my mind!

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    1. thank you so much! we are so blessed to welcome a baby boy and pray every day that he is healthy and well. you are the best!

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  12. Aww, this was sweet! I'm a mommy to a little boy and you're in for such a treat. They're a handful but they give so much love that it's incredible.

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    1. thank you so much!! :) we can't wait.

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  13. This is sweet!! You will always be that boys first love and his only non heartbreak!! The bond between a mother and son is unexplainable until you have a son!

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    1. so sweet! thank you so much, jessica!

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  14. Congrats on your baby boy! I have two girls and a boy and I love it. You will love it too i am sure, I also wanted a boy first when I first got pregnant, but God gave me a baby girl first and I couldn't be happier. Three years later my twins came to the picture and I got what I wanted the couple(a boy and a girl)! Boys hold such a special place in a mother's hearts and they will always be mommas boys :)

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    1. so sweet! i am beyond excited! congrats to you- so many precious blessings! your comment meant a lot to me! thank you.

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  15. Loved this glimpse into your heart & soul, Nelle! I've had people say similar things to me for quite awhile "you NEED a girl" - what's funny is that for such a long time I've always had a feeling our first would be a boy. We shall see :) Of COURSE we just want our babes to be healthy, but I also think there is something to having a gut feeling or connection to something you don't even fully understand yet. It's very deep, so special!

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    1. thank you so much- xo. sending love and prayers your way! your comment meant a lot to me...

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  16. beautiful! As a boy mom myself I agree!!! Love it

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  17. So beautiful. Praying for you and your son! I love how real you were in this post. Sometimes, as Christians, we try to pretend like we are perfect. But, life isn't perfect and we need to share these thoughts and feeling with others.

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    1. thank you so much! i def. exposed my heart and soul and couldn't be more excited about this journey!!

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  18. What a great post. So much love!! As a mom of a girl and a boy, I have to say it's so special either way. Every baby's personality is so different, but my son is the sweetest. He loves his mama and it just melts my heart. Sometimes I get sad thinking someday he'll potentially be a grungy teen boy with gross jokes and locker room smell (haha) but I guess it's part of the experience!!! ;)

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    1. thank you so much! and one of each is so special! your comment meant a lot to me… so sweet. excited to follow you!

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